August 20, 2013
Dan likes to see how riled up I get when he asks me that question: “What did you DO all day?” He usually throws it out there when I’m ranting about the dirty floors or whining about how tired I am or complaining about how the girls can destroy the house in 15 minutes after I spent 3 futile hours cleaning up. It’s all in good fun when he asks it and most of the time, I just laugh and shake my head because I know he knows how busy the days are with the kids and he’s commiserating with me, in a way. But… I’m not gonna lie, eeeevvvvery once in a while I’m just Not In The Mood and when he says that, my blood starts to boil and I’m just… NO. NO, DO NOT ASK ME THAT QUESTION UNLESS YOU WANT A VERY LONG LIST AND POSSIBLY WANT PUNCHED IN THE FACE.
With one week left of summer vacation/maternity leave/my last time as a full-time stay at home mom with three children, I realized that some days, I get to 8pm and I look around my house that looks like I live with frat boys, half-filled sippy cups strewn about, discarded dress-up dresses in the entry way, 87 pairs of shoes in the dining room, sticky floors, laundry un-folded in the hallway… and I ask MYSELF that question: What the HELL did I even DO all day?
So I decided to write it all down one day. This was last Thursday, a pretty typical day at home this summer, with the exception that we had a dishwasher dude stop by to figure out what is wrong with ours (The Bad News: the pump and water sensor need replaced after just 2 years. The Good News: we purchased the 5 year home warranty thingie so it’s ALL COMPLETELY COVERED HALLELUJAH.)
Keep in mind that this was what I would consider a VERY productive and pretty darn good day. I’m also figuring that this is a pretty typical day for any parent who stays home with multiple children and/or an infant. But I’m writing it down here so in a few years when I’m wistful for the Baby Days, I can read this and go HAAAA NEVERMIND I LIKE MY SELF-WIPING, SELF-FEEDING CHILDREN, ACTUALLY.
5:00am: hear squawks and cries on the baby monitor; stumble in to feed Zach
5:30am: crawl back in bed
6:00am: can’t sleep, belly growling. Get up and into the shower
6:30am: Zach wakes just as I’m finishing getting dressed. Head downstairs with him to make breakfast for myself (omelette w/bacon, green onions, tomatoes, cheddar, coffee), clean up a little bit while things cook. Zach hangs out in the exersaucer.
7:00am: finish eating, give Zach a bottle
7:20am: Audrey comes downstairs, all cute and sleepy-headed. Change her diaper, put in a movie at her request.
7:30am: get Audrey breakfast (cereal bar, yogurt, milk). Maggie appears in the kitchen, so make her breakfast as well (pancakes [from the freezer because HAAAA], cereal)
7:30am-8:20am: while the girls eat and Zach hangs out on his playmat/in the exersaucer, unload dishwasher, clean up the kitchen.
8:20am: take Zach upstairs for his first morning nap
8:20am-8:50am: sweep the kitchen and living room floors, fold laundry. The girls watch My Little Pony on the Kindle.
8:50am: Zach is awake
9:00am-9:10am: let Zach hang in his crib for a few minutes while I put away laundry in his room
9:15am: come downstairs with a re-diapered Zach, Audrey asks for a snack (pretzel sticks). Realize I’m hungry too. (yogurt)
9:20am-9:30am: Zach is hungry too. Feed him a bottle.
9:30am-9:45am: snuggle on the couch with Zach after his bottle, catch up on Twitter, Facebook, email on my phone
9:45am-10:00am: help Audrey brush her teeth, clean up the girls’ bathroom, change Zach’s stinky diaper
10:00am: Most feared words for a mother to hear: “Can I play Playdoh?” And I get it out. Am an idiot and a sucker.
10-10:15am: fold some more laundry while Zach plays on his mat and the girls’ play Playdoh
10:20am: Zach is rubbing his eyes and fussing, time for another nap
10:30am: Zach is asleep. I remember to get out steaks for dinner, Maggie goes outside to play with a neighbor.
10:30am: head upstairs to sort winter/summer clothes for the girls
10:45am: dishwasher guy shows up, Maggie and neighbor girl come inside to play with Audrey
11:10am Zach wakes up, dishwasher guy leaves
11:10am-11:20am: Disciplinary Situation with the girls, ssiiiiiiighh
11:30am: everyone is occupied so I eat a quick lunch (can’t remember what??)
11:45am-12pm: get the girls some lunch (can’t remember what??)
12:10pm: feed Zach a bottle
12:30pm: clean up the kitchen from lunch, wipe Audrey off because damn, that girl can make a mess of herself
12:40pm: ANOTHER dirty diaper from Zach, good gracious child
12:45pm: another nap for Zach
1:00pm: Maggie heads to the neighbor girl’s house to play. Audrey asks for a snack (graham crackers & milk), I wash some dishes. I clean up the Playdoh in the dining room.
1:30pm-1:45pm: attempt to get Audrey to take a nap. We read 2 books and snuggle.
1:45pm: Zach wakes up.
2:00pm: give Zach a bottle. As he’s eating, he looks sooo sleepy and is rubbing his eyes after he’s done. So I decide to rock him again to see if he’ll fall back to sleep.
2:30pm: Zach LAUGHS at my attempt at another nap, so I give up and take him back downstairs. Check on Audrey on the way down- she’s passed out asleep. YAY!
2:30pm: play with Zach on his playmat to try to tire him out. Get myself a snack.
3:10pm: He’s sleepy again! Rock him in the glider in his room.
3:40pm: After 30 minutes and 4 failed crib transfers, I give up on the nap again.
4:00pm: give Zach a bottle
4:10pm: FINALLY. He sleeps.
4:12pm: JUST KIDDING HE’S AWAKE AGAIN
4:27pm: HE SLEEPS. I make it down the steps this time. So yay!
4:30pm: Audrey’s still snoring, Maggie is at the neighbor’s house. I’M ALONE AT LAST. So I clean the Crap Magnets around the house (dining room table, counter in the butler’s pantry, kitchen island). Scrub glitter glue from the dining room table. Dan calls, he’s on his way home. Do a few things on the computer. My free time has gotten extremely lame.
5:10pm: start dinner (steaks and… noodles? And green beans? I think? I can’t even remember.)
5:20pm: Zach & Audrey are both awake
5:30pm: DADDY’S HOME WOOOOOOO
6:00pm: shovel in dinner, give Zach a bottle, he’s kinda fussy GO FIGURE NAP-FIGHTER. My sister calls so we chat for a bit.
6:30pm: clean up the kitchen Good Enough, leave the rest for tomorrow.
6:45pm: It’s gorgeous outside, so I take girls to our neighborhood playground & leave Dan with fussy baby for bedtime. Sorry, Dan!
7:15pm: realize Audrey needs a diaper change so we head home from the playground. Maggie hurts her foot on the way down the hill (she’s fine)
7:30pm: Zach is in bed, the girls settle on the couch for some tv time before bed. MAMA IS GOING FOR A WALK.
8:00pm: Get the girls upstairs for bed.
8:15pm: I realize my poor flowers on the front porch need some water, so I do that, then head upstairs to wash my face and take out my contacts.
8:30pm: stretch and do my ab work. Realize I am super out of shape. Again. ARGH.
8:45pm: watch TV (New Girl on the Kindle) and paint my nails. I should go to bed soon but man, the quiet time on the couch is so nice.
9:45pm: Hear something on the stairs. Oh hi, Audrey! Escort her back to bed.
10:00pm: force myself to go upstairs to bed. Read for like 6 minutes. Fall asleep with my Kindle on my face.
Tomorrow? I’ll do it all again.