April 5, 2011
“I have to go out of town in April,” he said. “The week of your birthday.”
“Aw crap! Where are you going?” I asked.
“I… don’t want to tell you.”
Turns out, he’s going to Las Vegas for a conference. And staying at a REALLY SUPER AWESOME hotel. On my birthday. Next week.
And I’m going with him.
We’ve been parents for 4 years. And we are very very blessed with lots of opportunities for (free!) babysitting from family- the grandparents on each side live less then 15 minutes away and are always willing to help out. We’ve had many dinners and parties out and a couple of overnight sleepovers for Maggie at The Grandmas’ houses when she was old enough. But it’s been 4 years since we’ve had more than a day together- no kids, just us (unless you count last year when my mom watched Maggie for a few days while we traveled to Baltimore for his grandmother’s funeral and I was eating Jolly Ranchers by the bagful because they were the only thing that helped ease my first trimester nausea, but I’m pretty sure nobody would count THAT as a vacation.)
This winter was very very very long. I know just about everyone around here in western PA would agree. The weather was cold and dreary and snowy and neverending (case in point: it’s April 5th and it snowed this morning. GRR.) Add to the normal Winter Blahs a fussy, reflux-y, teething infant, struggles with breastfeeding, being stuck inside the house for days on end with said fussy baby and a three year old, plus all of us getting really sick in February, and a bunch of weeks strung together with very little sleep… and you can see why I finagled my way into this trip.
(A huuuuuge thank you to my mom, who is staying with the girls while we’re away, and also to Dan’s parents, who are filling in some gaps for the days when my mom has to work and the girls don’t have daycare. GRANDPARENTS RULE.)
I just… I need a break, you guys. I mean, we ALL do, I know. All of us parents, working so hard, all the time, for everybody else. It’s exhausting, right? I can’t tell you what it did for my spirits to have something to LOOK FORWARD TO in the midst of the February Snow and Cold and Sickness. I need to get away from it all. Away from laundry and washing bottles and stumbling into the baby’s room at 1am, 3am, 4am to replace a lost pacifier. Away from work (which is going fantastic, by the way! Very busy! Holy crap! Also: yay!)
But most importantly, honestly- I miss my husband. And I don’t mean that in a *winkwinknudgenudge* kind of way (although, okay, maybe just a LITTLE BIT in that way. ha) When you have a baby in the house (not to mention a preschooler), a lot of the times, you see the other Grown Up as another warm body to help out with things, rather than that person you love. Conversations revolve around poop and bottles and eating and napping and who is giving who a bath and can you grab that basket of laundry at the bottom of the steps for me? And often times it’s 11pm before we actually look at each other and go “Hey! How are ya? How was your day?” It’s a little bit sad, but it’s just how it is these days. We wouldn’t change a thing, obviously: we LOVE our girls!
But a break. Something grown up. A few conversations that DON’T involve bodily functions of either small human living in our house.
IT WILL BE AWESOME, YOU GUYS.
Dan of course has some geeky work things to attend for the conference- but while he’s doing that, I’ll be sleeping till AS LATE AS I WANT TO. Getting long, quiet, relaxing showers (without listening with one ear for a crying baby. THE LUXURY!) Lounging by the pool, reading Twitter on my phone and catching up on blogs without feeling guilty or bouncing a baby on my lap at the same time. Perhaps booking myself a 32nd birthday massage. Wandering around the resort with my camera, taking pictures of pretty things. And at night, we’ll be wearing fancy clothes for some cocktail parties. Gambling a little bit of money at the casinos. People-watching.
A few people have asked me if I’ll be nervous leaving the girls. One on hand- no, not at all. We’re leaving them in very capable hands all around, and I’m going to have a novel of instructions and things about Audrey so they’ll be well-prepared. And Maggie is almost a no-brainer these days, she’s so easy (and actually pretty helpful with the baby too!) But on the other hand- of COURSE I’m nervous. It’s the first time we’ll BOTH be leaving BOTH of them for more than few hours. And we’ll be on the other side of the country. And we’ve never left a little baby for this long, ever. So yeah, a little nervous. But that’s normal, I think.
And will I miss them? Yes. YES I WILL.
I’m looking forward to it ;)