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Maggie snippets


Several times in the past few days, when we have done or said something that Maggie didn’t like, she responded by saying, “You don’t CARE to me!” or “You don’t CARE!” As in: You don’t LOVE me. OMG. She’s not even THREE YET, PEOPLE. How are we ever going survive THIRTEEN???

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The best- and I think the funniest- I’m-Not-Yet-Three-But-I’m-Going-To-Act-Like-An-Angsty-Teenager thing she’s been doing lately… After we say No, you can’t have a piece of candy after breakfast. or No, you can’t play with knives and fire. or No, you can’t watch Word World for the 8,928 time since your nap, she gets all serious, points her finger at us, and says slowly, in a deep voice: “Don’t. say. no. to. me. again!”

And sometimes she adds: “I da TEACHER, you LISTEN TO ME.”

I love that she goes to daycare and picks this stuff up. COMEDIC GOLD.

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As you can probably tell, Maggie’s language has EXPLODED in recent weeks- and not just in a mean, violent way like the above examples. Her latest words, USED CORRECTLY: absolutely, cooperate, ridiculous. She even corrected her own grammar the other day after she said “I losed it”. Then she looked at me and said, “I LOST it.”

Of course, she also says “Have NOT any pancakes, Mommy!” when I ask her if she wants pancakes for breakfast and she is trying to convince me that we don’t have any left. So, she’s obviously still two. heh

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Last night, Dan spent about 2 hours dismantling my laptop (MY PRECIOUSSSS…) in an attempt to clean the fan and hopefully stop it from making the horrible rattling, buzzing noise it started making on Monday night. (Spoiler: It didn’t work. $60 for a new fan/heatsink. But if it means I won’t be driven batshit-insane by the sound while I’m working, IT’S WORTH A SHOT.)

Anyway, yesterday morning Maggie came downstairs and heard the sound my computer was making. Then last night when Dan was working on it, she said, “Daddy fix you com-pooter so it doesn’t go BZZZZZZZZ! *shakes head back and forth really fast*”

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Twice in the past week, we casually mentioned it would be bathtime soon. You know, in an effort to prepare her for the upcoming event and avoid an epic battle because she knows that after bath comes bedtime and OMG I’M NOT DONE PLAYING YET.

Twice, after bringing up bathtime, a few minutes later we turn around to find this:

…and a naked kid running up the stairs toward the bathroom.

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Lest you think parenting an adorable little blond, curly-haired girl is all fun and games, last night she was playing with Dan and somehow during the fun, she bit him. And of course he yelled at her- loudly- and she proceeded to stare blankly into space for a few minutes (and then at me, like I’M going to save her), and then BURSTING into tears. HUGE tears and racking sobs, so much drama. So then we found ourselves consoling our crying child, after SHE was the one who did something wrong.

She sure knows how to work it, this kid.

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14 Comments


  1. samantha jo campen

    Dec 30 at 1:15 pm

    I love the naked. Now that’s a girl who KNOWS about bathtime!

    I must have been saying ‘minor detail’ to Bryan lately or something because yesterday I (tried) to pull Theo out of the car seat but forgot to unbuckle the crotch snaps. I said “Whoops! Sorry dude!” to which he replied (you guessed it) “Minor detail mommy.”

    YES!
    samantha jo campen’s last blog post: My thoughts and feelings on everything Christmas related



    • Jen

      Dec 30 at 1:20 pm

      LOL OMG! No freaking way. That’s not only adorable, but USED CORRECTLY. That’s what cracks us up, everything you say gets stored in their little brains and eventually comes back out at you. HA!



  2. Laura

    Dec 30 at 1:21 pm

    I love your Drama Tales because we don’t have those yet. Andrew is usually the mellowest kid ever.

    Also, “ridiculous” is a great word… Andrew says “nonsense”. Ha.
    Laura’s last blog post: reindeer sleigh, come our way



    • Jen

      Dec 30 at 1:22 pm

      I think girls are earlier with the drama and meltdowns, from what I’ve gathered from friends with boys (or both). Your day is coming… LOL



  3. Kelly

    Dec 30 at 2:00 pm

    Peanut has begun that drama thing. After he hits the dogs or us or does something else he shouldn’t, and we yell at him, he pauses, stands straight, and bursts into epic tears. And we’re like, aw crap, now what? The kid NEVER cries. You’d think after 2 years we could handle a crying child. Nope. Spoiled.

    She is too cute. Ridiculous? Adorable!
    Kelly’s last blog post: Week in Review



  4. bluzdude

    Dec 30 at 4:56 pm

    On the second item, I saw my nephew say something similar to his mommy, that he obviously heard quite often directed at him:
    “Don’t tell ME no…”
    bluzdude’s last blog post: Eh, What’s a Little Wind?



  5. Burgh Baby

    Dec 30 at 5:12 pm

    My favorite word around our house is “Ick-sgusting.” I love that Alexis took the word “disgusting” and found a way to make it more descriptive.

    Also, I love your kid. But you knew that.
    Burgh Baby’s last blog post: Easily Shattered, but Never Broken



    • Jen

      Dec 30 at 10:09 pm

      THAT’S the other one I was trying to think of!! (She does/says so many funny things, I can never remember them all by the time I get around to sitting down and writing.) Last week on Christmas Eve, I was trying to get her to come down to eat something with everyone, and she wrinkled her nose and said ‘It smells us-gusting.’ I said, ‘What does?’ She said, ‘All da food.’

      Ick-sgusting is better though. MUCH more descriptive. LOL



  6. the ambitious mrs

    Dec 30 at 10:23 pm

    Lily says “that one is yours, and this one is mines” – makes sense to me!

    Love that she stripped down for the bath!
    the ambitious mrs’s last blog post: Matter of Opinion



  7. Jim Bainbridge

    Dec 31 at 8:56 am

    Nothing make you feel like a shitty parent quite like the slowly melting into a cry face that kids make after you yell at them.



  8. Dave

    Dec 31 at 11:16 am

    We totally need to start doing “Abby snippets” on our blog – every time you do these posts, we are both nodding and smiling to everything you write, saying, “Hey, Abby did/does that!”

    Abby was all about the pointing finger and telling us not to say no to her, too. Same thing: low, serious voice, delivered one. word. at. a. time. Heh! (Including “I da teacher…” almost exactly the same phrases!)

    TOOO CUTE about the computer fan noise!

    I think Rachel already tweeted this to you, but Abby did the same thing with the bath; Rachel said it’s almost bath time, and Abby came into the next room about 15 seconds later, totally naked.

    Abby is now saying things like, “And I give you one, ’cause you my friend!”
    Dave’s last blog post: Back to Normal Life



  9. Caity

    Dec 31 at 3:35 pm

    Oh my gosh your stories make me laugh SO HARD. Hahahahaha. That is so adorable. Never a dull moment, huh?



  10. Emily

    Jan 1 at 7:02 am

    The things kids say are just hilarious! My current favorite that my 3 year old son says is when he asks for a bowl of cereal. Sometimes he wants it with milk and sometimes without, so he says ” can I have cereal with no milk” which is a normal thing to say but if he does want milk, he says “can I have cereal with YES milk.” Cracks me up every time!



    • Jen

      Jan 1 at 12:44 pm

      haha that’s so cute! Maggie says ‘Leave them dry!’ when I ask if she wants milk on her Cheerios. So funny how they come up with their own sayings for things.