so. freaking. tired.
If you do not have kids yet but are planning to someday, please do not read this post. If you are currently pregnant, please do not read this post. You may find yourself frightened beyond comprehension. You have been warned.
If you are ‘childless-by-choice’, and want to reaffirm your decision, by all means, read on. If you have children and enjoy sharing in the misery that is sometimes parenthood, read on.
My kid slept for 4 hours last night. From 10-12, and then from 5-7. The five hours in between were a rotation of cuddling in the dark, screaming, crying (me AND her), Daddy on the couch with her, Mommy on the couch with her, Baby Einstein videos, Sesame Street, bottles of milk, bottles of water. Maggie crawling all over the couch and giggling at 3:30 in the morning. Mommy putting her in the pack-and-play with some toys and bringing her pillow out to the couch to try (unsuccessfully) to get some sleep. Maggie throwing all three pacifiers out of the pack-and-play within 10 minutes. Brilliant plan = FAIL.
Dan was fantastic. I was at my wit’s end several times, seriously, seriously ready to just ‘lose my shit’, as they say. I hate feeling that way. I hate when I am angry with Maggie and I yell at her for not sleeping. The way she jumped and reached FOR ME when I yelled ‘STOP SCREAMING AT ME!’ made me feel like a humongous pile of crap. Worst Mother on the Planet.
But I was so tired. So. Tired. I don’t even think we had a night this bad when she was a newborn. At least as a newborn, she couldn’t wiggle off our laps. She would sleep in between feedings. But this? This was against all laws of nature. She hadn’t slept in hours and SHE WAS HAPPY AND PLAYFUL AND GIGGLY. Until we put her in her crib and then she screamed like someone was removing limbs from her body.
Dan finally got her to fall asleep around 5am. FINALLY, I thought. And naturally, she’ll sleep in, she’s got to be exhausted.
She was awake at 7am. She’s happy as can be, playing and laughing and crawling around. HOW CAN THIS BE? I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.
Dan went into work for a little while, but he said he’ll probably come home early. I’m not even going to get my hopes up for good naps today. I can’t take the crushing disappointment. My goal right now: One hour at a time.
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Man I feel for you! Poor thing, you and her both!
I wonder if the transition from formula to whole milk has bothered her system and causing her to have a hard time sleeping/staying asleep.
I hope she starts sleeping better for you at night…SOON!
Julie’s latest blog post: Can someone explain this to me?
Twitter: melissa_listens
*slaps knee* That does it! No kids for me!
I picture that as me. Crying and screaming along with my kid. I hope that you get a little rest today. You never know….She might completely crash this afternoon — and you can have a nap! *keeping my fingers crossed and prayers coming your way*.
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I feel your pain. Oh, yes, yes I do. There will be many nights where we feel like crap for acting how we do, but the good thing is is that we KNOW it. Step back, breathe and hug the little happy munchkin in the morning. I have to tell myself this over and over and OVER. Then, I go around and throw out the tear-filled tissues from both of our crying episodes. LOL!
Twitter: melissity
I’m sorry to hear you all had such a rough night. :( You & Dan are awesome parents just for trying so hard. It can only get better, right? *hugs*
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I’m sorry your night was rough.
I hit rock bottom this morning with NatNat and called the doctor…. turns out she has an ear infection in both ears, a runny nose, and a mild throat infection. Plus, we have to go back tomorrow morning to have blood taken because she doesn’t eat and hey think she’s anemic. All in all… bad morning.
I hate to say it, but maybe you should take her to the doctor and get her checked out? I just thought NatNat was teething…. turns out I was seriously wrong. (of course now I’m feeling like all kinds of a bad parent for letting her be sick in the first place).
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Does it help to know that mine was sleeping through the night at that age? No? Oh. Well, she’s not anymore. I think we all get a dose of sleepless nights at some point. Hopefully you are at the end of your beating and it won’t ever happen again.
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I feel SO sorry for you. That is just the worst. Why do they do that?!?! And you bring up a good point … how can they function (and well!) on that little sleep! It’s completely counterintuitive. We just got through a TON of sleep problems and I don’t think we’re completely out of the woods, but we definitely had a couple of nights JUST LIKE that. I think my husband and I took turns being the patient one. Probably him more than me. I do not do well w/o sleep. AT ALL.
I sincerely hope your day has gone better than your night. Hang in there.
I can take the crying and screaming a hell of a lot easier than I can take wanting to play at 3am.
My daughter has done that a couple of times in the last 2 months or so (she’s almost one now), and those nights I just want to let the cat raise her. At least when she’s just crying she wants something and I can get it for her; but when what she wants is to not be in the crib and for me to play with her….
Gah.
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Oh. I am so sorry! That sounds awful.
Don’t be too hard on yourself… I’ve been real close to losing my shit, too. And I’ve been known to hiss “will you f***ing go to SLEEP, please?”
Hope tonight’s better!
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I just have to say, I don’t think anything can be as bad as having a newborn. When I’m in the bathroom every night at 1:30 am, crying my eyes out, wanting to jump off a bridge, and not caring that my child is awake and inconsolable in the other room….. then I’ll start to consider it being THAT bad.
I saw on your Twitter she napped well today. I hope you have a better night tonight. *hugs*
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Twitter: samanthajcampen
Yeah, I should have just skipped that one.
Good Lord. So really, I’m never EVER getting a full night’s sleep again is what you’re telling me? Right? RIGHT?!
And yet, we continue to function on hardly any sleep. It’s a good thing our kids are cute lemme tell ya.
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Twitter: jayesel
@Julie: I thought of the milk thing, but she’s actually been drinking milk for about a month now- I started giving her one or two bottles a day with milk instead of formula to get her used to it (in case there WAS an issue with it!) So I don’t think that’s it. We really think it is/was her teeth waking her up, but then she was just in the mood to play and have fun for whatever reason. And really, THAT’S what made me even more mad than anything! If she had just been awake and fussy, that would be one thing. But awake and wanting to play and laugh and play peek-a-boo at 4am? I DON’T THINK SO. heh
Twitter: jayesel
@Kris: oh man, I’m so sorry! I wondered about ears and stuff last night in the midst of it all… but I’m pretty sure it’s nothing that serious. She was actually quite pleasant during the day today- and she took 2 very good naps!! She fell asleep for bed a little while ago on her own without a ton of snuggling first, so hopefully she’ll have a better night than last night.
I hope NatNat is better soon… and try not to feel bad for not knowing she was sick (I know it’s hard not to though) I swear, to be a parent, you have to have a medical degree and a detectives badge to get through each day!!!
Twitter: jayesel
@Burgh Baby: I hope the beating is over too! Maggie normally sleeps through the night just fine- I think that’s why it’s so rough when she doesn’t now and then, because we’re so used to a solid night of sleep (spoiled, maybe? heh) Plus there’s the whole ‘is something seriously wrong? should we call the doctor? or is it just normal fussy-ness?’ thing, never knowing if you’re doing the right thing. I think that might almost be worse than the not-sleeping (ALMOST.)
Twitter: jayesel
@Backpacking Dad: YEAH. The wanting to play in the middle of the night? REALLY made me mad. I definitely threatened to move out at least twice last night, lol.
Twitter: jayesel
@Laura: I guess it depends on who the newborn is ;) Maggie was probably one of the best newborns ever, we were so freaking spoiled and we had no idea. She got up a lot to eat, sure, but she would eat and fall right back to sleep- so even when I was feeding her 2 or 3 times a night, I’d still accumulate a decent night’s rest. But last night, not falling asleep myself until 5am? NOT COOL.
She did nap really well today (I don’t see how she couldn’t, she was exhausted!) and now she’s down for the night. We’re soon to follow! I figure even if I only get 4 hours of sleep tonight, that’s an improvement ;) heh
We’ve got it at our house too. It has to be teeth. Zane’s got at least 5 giant red bumps on his gums. 5 at once. Plus the one he’s been working on for a month now that finally came through. He’s been up twice already tonight and it’s only 10 pm. It’s going to be a Long Night.
so sorry, condolences, for your loss.. of sleep that is.
seriously I love sleep I think Rylan knows death would be upon her, should she screw with mommys sleep…. this next baby better listen up….
hahaha. yeah right. I do hope your sleeping now.
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I hope last night was better. Sending you some telepathic energy… (thinking if it works for Maggie and Maria’s germs, maybe it’ll work for us?)
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Twitter: jayesel
@samantha jo campen: YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO READ THAT! lol I probably should have included ‘new moms’ in that first category ;)
Don’t be scared!!! 95% of the time, Maggie sleeps great. It’s just when she’s sick that Life Sucks. For all of us. Turns out (if you didn’t see my tweet yet) that she has ‘hand-foot-mouth disease’. Which sounds HORRIBLE and DISGUSTING, but it’s just another one of those rashy-kid sicknesses that go around daycares like mad. She has these little bumps on her legs and arms and around her mouth (and presumably, IN her mouth and throat, which is what all the drool and screaming has been about) She slept much better last night, so yay!
It is true though- THEY ARE LUCKY THEY ARE CUTE.
I read, despite the warning…. :)
Seriously hand-foot-mouth!?!?! At least you know what’s going on, and hopefully the worst is over!!! You’re a good mommy!! A 5am bed time would break anyone! (btw, It’s hilarious that you threatened to move out, instead of threatening to make Maggie move out!) :)
I feel sorry for you and Maggie. This stage is so bad for them – they can’t talk and let us know what’s bothering them. And I feel so dumb when I can’t figure out what’s going on. It’s probably the teething that’s bothering her. Don’t worry ..she’ll be alright. It took a few weeks ( I know that’s long) for my son but it will be over soon and you will enjoy the coming months more than ever once she starts walking and will be all over the place. You said it right..it sucks when they sleep and I hate those sounds of silence.
Anyways, hope she feels better and sleeps through the night. Get some rest yourself.
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So been there. It was right around Amelia’s birthday and she had a night like that. Of course, my husband slept through the whole thing, but I was up with her almost all night long and it was horrible. I was so tired, she was tired. And then we went to visit family and celebrate her 1st birthday. Same thing. Thankfully, my parents took over one night.
Turns out it was her antibiotics that were making her so jittery she couldn’t sleep. The poor thing was miserable. Between my mother and I we figured it out and stopped giving it to her. That night, she slept like an angel.
Glad you finally figured out what was causing her sleepless night.
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